So I’ve been a little AWOL for a while. No sugar coating, no bullshit, it’s just been a bit of a rough time.
I have, for the most part, felt good and not felt down or depressed. I think the best way to describe it as anxiety. I apologise to the regular reader here, but for those not in the loop, I’ve recently changed medication from Mirtazapine to Sertraline and have been documenting the effects for the last several entries (which you can read here, here and here as well as other entries. Go read them. Now).
So again, to recap, I’ve been feeling less depressed than I probably have been, but more anxious than I really have been. Also I’ve experienced an increasing number of side effects, the most recent of which was headaches and pains around my eyes. What I should probably mention about now is that I’ve been meaning to get my eyes tested for about a year now as I haven’t been tested in about 5 years. So basically instead of dismissing the headaches/eye pain as a symptom of Sertraline side effects I booked myself in for a check up. Turns out it wasn’t a reaction to the new tablets, but shockingly I, in fact, need glasses.
So, yeah. I wear glasses now. Glasses are cool. (Photo of new glasses to be uploaded as soon as they arrive)
So besides that I’ve just generally felt unwell for the past few weeks, I’ve been finding it extremely difficult to concentrate. I can’t seem to focus to sit down to complete assignments (nor new posts for this blog). It’s not even like I’ve felt like I’ve done nothing. In part it feels a lot like I’ve procrastinated for the last 3 weeks or so but it’s not even that. It’s like a feeling of restlessness.
Any how, I had a check up with my Doctor this week, where we discussed the issues I’ve been experiencing and it was decided between us to up my dose of Sertraline from 50mg to 100mg.
So this week I’ve pretty much been at an all stop. Consciously choosing not to go into college, or write, or go to the gym, or do much of anything other than finally watching Arrested Development on Netflix.
This is usually the point of an update where I’d say, “but now the fog is clearing and everything is getting better”. Again, no bullshit, I’m feeling better knowing that stuff is being done to physically help me, but right now the battle is within me to motivate myself.
Tomorrow is a Bank Holiday here in the UK, which means I’ve got an extra day off college. I’ve got about 3 units of my course to get back on top of, but the first thing I’m planning to do tomorrow is to get back to the gym – wonky eyes or not.
Yup, I’m beating the same drum I always beat – Keep to a routine.
(I really need my own sign off phrase)